GETTING TO KNOW ME..                                                                    

The softly falling rain, almost a mist, was a welcome respite from the tremendous storm last night.  I poured myself a cup of coffee, added the sugar free vanilla creamer and headed to the covered front porch to sit, rock and absorb the peacefulness of this Saturday morning.  The birds were loving it!  Red cardinals, yellow finches,  tiny house wrens flitting back and forth between the trees….must feel so good to them after the depressing heat of this summer.  I toyed with the idea of walking to the middle of the yard, lifting my face skyward and allowing the mist to cover my face, but regained my sanity and let that fleeting thought go!  This is the kind of morning I like.  Which got me to thinking….yes, here I go ‘thinking’ again!  But my thought was:  how much do we really know about each other?  Our likes, our dislikes,  our who cares?

I remember having a conversation with my husband several years ago about this very subject, and we began to question one another about things that meant a lot to us that perhaps we had missed during our long journey together.  He flunked!  But that was really ok, because his ‘love language’ was in the ‘doing’ more than in the touchy, feely things.  I passed his questioning but I think that may be a woman thing.  Anyhow, (I regress),  I began to wonder how much do my friends and family really know about me, so I’m going to write some things down…..sounds self-centered I know, but it really isn’t.  To actually begin to understand someone,  it’s a good idea to know these things and use them to nurture relationships because, let’s face it,  familiarity has it’s rewards as we build friendships and family understandings.  I bet just by reading what I’ve written so far allows a person to know a little about me already! 

Yes, you guessed it, I love the misty, soft rain….it makes me feel nurtured.  I suppose it’s because it is doing just that to the earth, making everything green and beautiful…coming down gently, not forcefully, but with the caring touch of a mother.  This morning it is watering my favorite flower, the daisy.  Can anything look as pure as a daisy?  Brilliant white, with an explosive touch of bright yellow touching it’s center.  I could stare at one all day, it’s beauty filling me with peace.  Thank you Lord, for this beauty!  The smell of the fresh mown grass fills my senses, loving how it fills the air with it’s warm aroma.  Oh how I wish I could bottle this for the long winter months!  My favorite color?  Shades of green….I pick no particular one…some being subtle, others quite vivid! They all bring a sense of well being to me….perhaps that is why I use it so fluently in my home.  How about my favorite emotion?  Of course that would be love, indescribable, butterfly, quivering heart love....the depth of the feeling denys explanation.....but you know what?  I love laughter!  Life can toss us so many harsh realities, that when I can experience a good belly laugh or hear one, it fills me with hope….hope that there really is a brighter side to everything!  Favorite thing to do?  Share time with family or friends.  I’ve never understood the need to fill time with busyness for busyness sake.  I know it’s good to have times of action packed fun, but I’m talking favorites here…so that for me is sharing time.  Perhaps I didn’t have enough of that growing up, so now I crave it …but it’s a good thing!  Call me boring…it tis what it tis! 

And what is my favorite food?  Why Mexican of course!  Is there any other?  And I hope and pray this ol’ body will be able to withstand the after effects of a good Mexican meal for a long, long time!  With each new restaurant I visit I must try their tamales….so few make really great ones!  They’re actually not my favorite item, but hey, I still must try them!  Which brings me to dessert.  Skip chocolate anything  but bring on everything else!   Seriously, give me a big hunk of moist, heavy, raisin and walnut laden carrot cake and I’ll love you forever!

 Unfortunately, with type 2 diabetes, I must quench my desire for a good dessert which makes me very, very crabby!  How about candy bars…..a Payday and a Pepsi changes my outlook and turns a bad day into a glad day!  J  Ya, I could probably live on sweets which undoubtedly brought me to my current situation today…diabetes and a very unfortunate looking body!  Ah well, we only live once!

Entertainment.  Give me a good movie, one where I can cheer the hero, cry my eyes out, laugh till I hurt, or simply leave the movie house with a feeling of complete satisfaction.  But specifically,…a story of hardship, where good overcomes evil, and bad times give way to happiness…those warm my heart the most, and I definitely prefer the obscene to be left out....it doesn't add to the meaning in any way. 

I’ve always loved music…my mom once told me that I starting singing with the radio about age 4, and I could sing along to all the top tunes!  With the various decades, I've changed my ‘likes’ until finally I settled into  something that gives me pleasure whenever I hear it….Easy Listening, soft ballads…anything that soothes my soul.  My husband thought I loved Country Western because he did….I didn’t, but never let on that I didn’t.  At times I thought if I heard one more Johnny Cash song I would vomit!  But it brought him joy and that helped me endure it.  I’m so happy I did that, because now with nothing but time to myself I realize making someone else happy is more important than my selfish desires.  Besides, I could always crank up my kind of music in my car!

Clothes?  Well, I’m a tomboy at heart, always have been, so I’m most comfortable in jeans and a sweater, stocking feet, a good book and a cup of coffee. Casual is my middle name.  Dressing up brings me down.  Don’t get me wrong,..I can do it up good when the occasion calls for it,…buuuuuuuuuuut! I’d rather not.  Shopping gives me pleasure and an item found on sale brings ecstasy!   Jewelry?  Very little.  My hands are too big for rings, my neck too fat for neckaces, so earrings are the jewelry of choice.  Throw in the occasional bracelet that’s big enough to go around a truck drivers wrist and there ya go!  Big momma ready to take on the town!  J

So, in general, I have many things that I like…..my church, a good sermon, teaching Bible studies,   volunteering,  laughing, singing, gardening, tennis, golf, biking,  reading, writing,  good coffee, fun, shopping, travel, quiet evenings watching my favorite TV shows,  movies,  walking, cook books, listening to the sounds of early morning,  feeling the warmth of the sun through a window on a cold winters day,  a cozy fireplace,  surprise gifts, unexpected phone calls, keeping in touch with old friends, making new friends,  cherishing current friends,  memories,  enjoying visits from my grands, but there are few things that I love deeply….  Jesus my Lord, my children, my grandchildren, my sisters and brother and the love I had with my husband that will fill my heart forever.  Sometimes I feel we throw the word 'love' around too easily without really realizing the intensity of the meaning.  I personally do not believe I can describe it...but I know I can feel it, and this too is from God.

 Deep within, my biggest desire is to be known, really known.  What a blessing it is to take the time to really get to know someone,...not only were we created for fellowship with God, but with on another.  Many of the things I’ve listed are superficial, non-essential things.  What I really want to leave as a legacy to my family and friends is that they remember me for who I really was.  A mother and grandmother who loved deeply, who would have given her life and all she had for her children and grandchildren, and  a wife who cherished her husband through thick and thin, .. a friend you could count on, a prayer warrior for those in need,  and a woman who lived a life that glorified God in all she did.  Now that’s what I’d really like.