Ah yes...Saturday dawned bright and beautiful for once this early April day. What to do, what to do??!! Of course! I shall tackle the project that has been interrupting my sleep cycle for several nights....'the bumblebee project!' Those beautiful costumed buzzers have been repeat visitors the last several summers, at first not causing a disturbance, in fact it was rather pleasant to see them lazily go too and fro from their under deck domicile. But then, wham-o..the great bumblebee fiasco hit us last summer, causing hysterical screaming and running about the yard like maniacs, swatting, spraying, using deck pillows as self-defense mechanisms....they turned psycho! Hence...my quest to exterminate the whole lot of them this spring before the invaders disturb yet another peaceful summers day.
This shouldn't take very long...take out a couple deck boards, remove nest, dump in some Sevin...replace boards, screw down...voila! Done! Or so I thought.
Let me begin with the board removal. Some wise guy drove the nails below the wood surface giving me no leverage to remove them (that would have been ME three summers ago)....trotting to the garage for the crowbar, I giddily invisioned a hasty flip of a board and on with my task. But NO! Not enough space to leverage the bar between the boards...now what? Think! Think! Ok,..screwdriver in hand, hammer in another I proceed to chip away around the nailhead, exposing it's shiny little hidden head.
Bam! Hammer hits hand.....how does one NOT jump up and start screaming expletives
while trying to maintain composure so the neighbor won't start peering out their window? Well, I didn't...I let 'er rip! Quick look...no blood...pain subsided...project continued. Damn nail! Fat widow woman struggles down to her knees to persist in defeating this enemy. Enter, pliers...wiggle, wiggle, turn, turn...up she comes! Crowbar inserted, leverage achieved...push, crack..BOARD BREAKS! Enter reciprocal saw....sawed off that part of the board! Take that! Removal of the next two much easier...but I used the saw to cut off just the part I needed...not a good idea...more later on that.
Off to Home Depot...loaded arms with weapons of war...back to base of operation in record time!
Dumped said ingredients into exposed territory below...NOTHING could survive those chemicals of warfare! Measured length of board I need to cut to cover hole....grab saw, commence to attack...saw blade flies across the yard landing where cat was sitting minutes earlier....darn..would have been my chance to get rid of that darn cat! Re-attach blade..finish sawing, place boards in position. So who cares if one end of the adjoining boards don't exactly fit flush and stand 1/2" higher than it should therefore causing future toe stubs? I'm tired of this warfare and yet I have one more crucial invasion...nail those suckers down! Enter drill and deck screws.
Using a nail to forge a hole before inserting screw, I pick up the instrument of war that I am not all that familiar with....insert screw, place drill bit in position, fire away....ZAP! Knothole! Now I know why I used nails last time...trotting off to the garage .........
Well, it may not be the most visually perfect job..but it's a job done! Next???
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