The "Day is Here"...

The day has come. I've been telling myself this is the day I officially become old, the day when the last season of life begins and I better pull up my big girl panties and deal with it! 70!! What????!! How can this be! My 'insides' feel 18, my mirror suggests otherwise...whom do I believe? The mirror. I awoke last nights sleep around 11:45pm, looked at the bright red digital numbers, counting the last minutes of being 69..wanting to stop the clock, reach back and pick a time when everything was so perfect, so day to day, never thinking this time of life would come so quickly. But here it is, wrinkles, gray, sags, bags, and such a profound reluctance to leave my youth. I've always told myself I would age gracefully, never trying to fool the world with vain procedures, but simply be thankful for the years I had been given, the memories that were formed, and the love that endured before he left me way too soon, leaving an empty space in my heart and life that will forever be there. Even if there is a 'someone' out there to walk these last paths by my side, that space will always be reserved for him. I still feel the same, to age gracefully that is, but the reality of time raised it's head and smiled as if to say..."it's time", time to simply begin to enjoy life, to raise grateful hands to God for all He has given me an all He still has in store for me. It's a bittersweet time, a time of sadness at what is done, yet joy for what is still out there. These could be years of negativity, always striving for that 'something' that never quite occurs, or it could be years of pure joy and happiness, casting my cares on the One who loves me and wants the best for me always. I choose to trust in that...to reign in those thoughts that try to take me captive and to constantly look up. Why waste these precious years. I have so very much to be thankful for, a marriage of 47 years, 3 beautiful children, 9 amazing grands, God's provision for my life in every season through sickness, adversity, separation, loneliness, but always experiencing His ever present love and guidance. Yes, it's my 70th birthday, yes, I'm a little sad, but no, I won't drown in self-pity, for I have far too much to look forward to! What does God have in store for me? I don't know, but I look forward to each new, beautiful day that He chooses to give me and to give thanks to the Lord...for He IS good! I wish I could reach out and hug each person who has ever crossed my path, adding that special something that only they could add, therefore making me the person I am today. A special touch from each one. Consider yourselves hugged and loved from the deepest part of my heart and soul...you have made my life complete, and I look forward to each blessed year ahead. We may never cross paths again in this journey, yet I take a part of each one of you with me....life is good!