Life does not always give us what we want...or what we were sure it would. It just doesn't happen. Perhaps we're given a second chance....perhaps not. My heart can still dream. It can visualize a fulfilling future, a path leading into a new love, a fearless walk into that enigma called old age, holding hands with the one who has promised to be there, to share my soul, to laugh and cry with, to face uncertain times....just being with me..drowning that fear of dying alone.
My mind can make plans, my heart can imagine taking a leap of faith into the unknown but my soul must be open to the will of God and His plan for my life.
Do I dare say the word 'trust?' Trusting in God's plan..not mine? Somehow that word ignites a feeling of hope...hope in the future,.. faith that even if He chooses to be the only One walking beside me, that I can fully lean on Him and dissolve any fear of journeying alone.
Life can be a disappointment at times on so many levels. Expectations can be smashed down, love can go away, friends can desert, children can disappoint,...but I need to ask myself..'how much effort did I put into these things? Was it life that disppointed me or was it me that caused the disppointment?' There is no time to park in the past, there is just the future to look toward,..He has our days numbered and safely tucked in His bosom, but until the day He calls me home, I want to forget disappointments, forgive where forgiveness is needed, and love where it is needed.
The Psalms declare my plea to my Lord and Savior: Teach me to number my days and recognize how few they are; help me to spend them as I should.
I do not want to live a life of regret, but of hope, trust and faith.
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