Life on My Own....

As I drove into my driveway this afternoon, I reminded myself to put away the Halloween decorations and move on to the Pilgrim theme...soon to be followed by the obligatory splash of Christmas lights and do-dads! Thoughts were drawn back three years, to the holidays before Dennis died. Who would have contemplated I would be journeying this path alone. Things I took for granted that were done by him, have now fallen on my shoulders. This third year finds me settling into a resigned routine and I find it gives me a sense of pride to perform these tasks.
It appears that I've found my 'new normal' and I'm facing life with a whole new outlook.
Don't get me wrong..the past two years weren't easy...all the 'firsts' were faced, the sound of 'empty' as I entered a silent house, motivating myself to go places alone while surrounded by couples, the empty chair at the table, ...oh I could go on and on, but God in His grace and mercy led me lovingly and patiently along the path to grief recovery. Books have been written, articles appeared for reading, grief groups joined, advice was given but all in all the grief had to be faced alone....not at any particular pace, just one day at a time, until one day I woke up and realized there was a lot of living to do out there. It was like the Lord said 'ok, let's get out there and do this thing called life that I've blessed you with...and I'll be right there beside you, giving you all the strength, wisdom and discernment you'll need to perservere.' I don't live life alone, He's provided all that He promised....He is faithful, I am grateful.